I’m sick of never being respected by men. Sick of dealing with scrotes in public and online who harass women and put our lives in danger. Even today at uni (I’m a research assistant working for a male grad student) I found out I can’t rely on him to write me a letter of recommendation for grad school anymore because my best friend/his lab partner rejected his offer for a date and he started to become aggressive and rude to me.
Another guy I was getting to know for a while told me today that his best friend owns a sex shop and they frequently go to conventions together.
ALL MEN have red flags and it only takes a few hours or even minutes of talking to them to figure out their problem. Men who only speak up for their own idea of feminism when it comes to defending sex work because they’re “not like other men,” yet they are like other men because they’re trying to get laid.
My own abusive father whose deranged behavior made my mother take refuge with two children across the world to get away from his violence claims that he’s not like other men. It’s so ironic that men cause all the problems in the world and when it comes to individual awareness and responsibility for these problems they always deflect the blame onto someone else.
I’ve only seen men in a negative light from within and outside of my family, only experienced dating with scrotes, and never had genuine male friends. I was never a hateful person when I was younger but the older I get the more I feel this hatred getting stronger towards men because they’ve never proven me wrong with good intentions and behavior.
If anyone has hopeful advice for how to cope in this society please let me know.
My best advice is don’t have male friends. Male “friends” will take advantage of you or discard you quickly if you’re unfavorable to them. Most will sexualize you and treat you like an object as well. I always hear stories about male “friends” masturbating to the thought of their attractive female friends or pictures of them. Both are blatantly disrespectful. Surround yourself with female friends. Focus on that good, sweet feminine energy. Also, most guys are hypocrites all around especially when it comes to sex work. They will support sex workers, but will never actually want to date a stripper or a porn star yet they watch a thousands of women have sex online, but cannot tolerate women having past experiences and partners in real life. I’m not sure if this is the advice you were looking for, but I hoped it helped. And I’m really sorry that happened in regards to your letter of recommendation. I hope someone else can you give you one
I’ve dealt with similar situations. Out of 3 companies I’ve worked for, similar shit happened in 2 of them. Men who are my seniors/supervisors become a full-on-shitty-scrote when I rejected them. Hate to tell you this, but even after working for so many years, I do not have a perfect solution for this. People who advise you to report to HR/authorities may have no idea what they’re talking about. Unless it’s outright rape or molestation, and even then you need to prove it, there’s no way you can officially report these scrotes for their aggressive, condescending, petty behaviours which turned 180 degrees after they got rejected. People who advise you to leave the company may also have no idea what they’re talking about. It might be fine if you’ve worked there for 5 years, but you can’t possibly leave a firm when you’re 1 month in. This is especially so if you’re a fresh grad. Whoever is reading this, do not make the mistake of accepting a date because you’re afraid. It will just get worse.
Make as much money as you possibly can, avoid debt, get an IUD and retire in peace
I always used to have male friends, but the past five years have shown me that the only reason they are friends with me is because they would someday like to have sex with me. When I found out they vote for politicians who want me to be livestock I stopped speaking to them. We have fundamental value differences that I am not willing to overlook.
Lately I’ve been seeing women complain on social media that if they are child free women, men will pretend to not want children to get with them only later to try to make them change their mind or baby trap them. And the same goes for women who want kids and men who don’t, they will lie to get laid. Which is why it’s important to not sleep with them too early. I truly enjoy sex, in my youth I had no problem having sex on the first date if I wanted to, yes I was a pathetic pick me and thank you people for helping me not be, but I’m not letting any of these scrotes touch my body. I don’t know a single man in my life that I would want to have sex with right now.
Join and support feminist groups, not radicals seeking more patriarchal violence, is helpful. It makes you feel less isolated alone and attacked. Joining extreme behaviour only gets you labelled as a person to be ignored further instead of getting the message out to many educating etc. Volunteering and supporting rape crisis centers, domestic violence clinics and women's refugees are helpful also. It makes you feel useful. Signing petitions and sending time dated email threads to every local TD MP or equivalent government minister is also helpful. It makes you feel heard and there is a thread of evidence if required. I know for a fact I'm seeing more women fight back this time against patriarchy and I'm also seeing the lies that patriarchy is spreading. Using psychological warfare saying we are a minority, when in fact we are a majority. If women who have been traumatized use their fear, for example turn it to anger, and don't allow another person who believes falsely that only they are superior, to brainwash fear monger and control their mind, then women collectively globally consistently can overcome this, little problem pun intended. I survived and I'm fighting back.