We all know FDS view on finance when it comes to relationships, a man should cover all expenses. There is something however that I noticed with the scrotes surrounding me.
In my culture it's also clear that a man is the breadwinner and has to pay for everything, even giving the woman money on a regular basis to spend it on the things she needs/wants. Sounds great! However, I have seen with the toxic men that if they ever have financial problems (e.g. being sick, a recession, an unexpected payment, etc.) they ask their women for help, which isnt inherently a bad thing (or is it?) but after a while they see this as a way to work around the original arrangement and make the woman contribute basically forever. They either will use the same excuse they used in the past or use new ones every time.
A personal experience here: My dad has a lot of illnesses, some of which make it impossible to work certain jobs (he always needs a bathroom around). He has a degree in IT which is ideal, it's a well paying job with bathrooms lol. Tell me why this man hasn't worked a proper job since 2011. He would constantly use his health as an excuse not to work to the point that we grew up poor. We would sleep on mattresses and not buy clothes for winter because my dad would tell us he just cant afford it. And I know sickness is a big deal, that's why me and my family never complained, like EVER. We supported my dad through this from 2011 until this year. We helped him with his creative projects and made it as easy as possible for him. My mom worked little jobs here and there and would go to food stamps to feed us (He thought it was beneath him to go). He rewarded us with exposing himself as a narcissist who lies, all. the. time. He would constantly tell me how his doctor tells him he is in perfect health and when I tell him great, you can work like all the other human beings on earth he would say well its not thaaat good 😥. Bullshit, when my mom said she wants to divorce him he applied for a job THAT WEEK, knowing he will have to support himself. A classic tale of if he wanted to he would.
The point of all this is, how to know if a man asking you for financial help is gonna turn into this mess or if its genuine. How do you vet for it or is the truth clear because he asked you in the first place? Tell me your thoughts.