I discovered my husband's porn addiction and walked out of a 10 year marriage over a year ago.
I am emotionally dead and don't feel like I am able to feel attraction or love again.
I'm not upset about this, but has anyone been in this before and how did you bring your heart back to life?
This is completely natural. It takes so much time for the body and brain to process this kind of betrayal. Please keep doing things that take care of you. Even if you can't feel the love, it will bring you back to a normal baseline. But don't rush it. You aren't wrong or broken. You are normal. Hugs!
Take time to heal and enjoy life again. Hobbies, friends, you-time. Make your life as awesome as possible. Focus on that first. The happier you are single, the better a place you will be in when you are ready to (be open) to love again.
Yoooo girl I feel you. Been there sis. Betrayal trauma is something else. I can promise you that you will bounce back, but you gotta invest time and effort in your healing process. Which you will, because you are worth it. Read: Leave a Cheater, Gain a Life. Also go through the author’s blog, google Chumplady. She’s amazing. After that, read and listen to everything Gail Dines. She is a godsend. Also, Lundy Bancroft if you haven’t already. His blog has great resources in addition to his book. All of this will really help put things in perspective and restore your sanity gradually. I say that bc after my DDay, I felt like I lost my mind bc everything that I thought was real was a lie. That was fun 🙃 In between all the reading and research, do a load of exercise and self-love. Nourish the fuck out of your mind and body. Pour the love into yourself that you were deprived of. Don’t expect to be attracted to males right now, that will take time. Your trust has been obliterated, just focus on healing bc you are not ready for dating. Go forth and conquer, my sister, your journey is waiting! 💪
I have. The first reactions to betrayal are hurt and the anger, but once those pass, numbness takes their place. It will pass, too