I think we need a safe space to discuss what's going on.

Oh wow, I just looked that up and there’s a lot of people who got banned for expressing their concerns? That’s alarming, reminds me of my Catholic high school years. I truly and honestly believe in FDS and what they provide to women around the world. I never spent time on Reddit, so this is alarming. Like, do I need to walk on eggshells on all platforms? I have hope that mods are able to differentiate constructive criticism vs attacking. Maybe they’re worn down and they don’t have much left in their tank to be patient and understanding. So it’s more one strike you’re out. However, IMO, if it gets to that point stepping away would be best to recover and wooo-saaah (example - closing the subreddit with open dialog and communication on other fronts). If we can hold space for someone who is somewhat against FDS’ values, then we can hold space for those who may “spoke out of turn” so to speak. But doing what is known to be controversial, they should already have plans in place to handle the consequences/backlash. I can’t support a brand that silences opinions that aren’t detrimental to the community. I think the brand/subreddit is still new, so it’s really just like a start up. They’ll make mistakes and they’re human. Gotta remind ourselves they’re not paid for this, and I hope they know they can walk away and let someone else take their place as needed. They shouldn’t dread or hold resentment towards their listeners/readers. If it gets to that point they need to set a boundary, take a breather, reevaluate what this means to them and why they took on the role, then move forward. Hopefully that’s what’s going on behind the scenes.

this will immediately get banned as my reddit account did but the details of what happened are on fds dissent. and no mods are furiously deleting threads there.

I'm extremely surprised by how this has been handled. There hasn't been enough communication with an audience of more than 100k women in the sub, plus the podcast regular listeners. The post made was extremely cryptical and doesn't care about telling more of the issues there. I feel like politics are part of an interesting conversation that many women can approach in a civilised and educated manner in the forum, and it would be really interesting and useful to learn about many queen's opinions. As for me, I did not enjoy the last episode of the podcast, and it's not because I am close minded, nor because I don't enjoy hearing people's opinions regardless if they differ from mine. It rubbed me the wrong way because all I heard were statements with not much of an explanation behind them. As a listener, I felt disconnected, disoriented and it left me wondering a lot of things.

I'm very out of the loop because I've never heard the podcast, but based on a Reddit post about it, it sounds like WE are fighting each other which upsets me. I don't care if this is cliché, but we need to stick together. Most people are against us and even if we disagree on things, I don't think we should be against each other.

While I understand the intent behind the decision to shut down the Reddit site (due to the issues stated above)- I'm having a difficult time making the leap to removing conversations and threads here, which were legitimate discourse. The problems about men lurking around shouldn't be a problem here, since you have to apply to be here. So I'm not sure why things are so buttoned up now on this site. Yesterday I posted about the difference between a strategy & an ideology. If the intent all along was to create an ideology, I want some transparency from the rulers of FDS- what set all of this off was not a small issue. By removing or some would say censoring some view points- you have now created a larger problem. I want to have some open & honest discussion (discussion goes both ways; it is not an edict from a moderator) about intent, ideology v. strategy, ways of handling viewpoints that may not be in agreement with others, & a roadmap for a way forward. This is exactly what FDS women do NOT need: something that divides us from what I believed the original intent of FDS was, a table that all women can sit at, and discuss issues which are predominantly dating, but can venture into other areas without censure, shaming or name calling. I'll be looking for a response, and I am interested in the ideas of others.

Oh no that's really disappointing and yeah Men! They shouldn't be allowed to see our sub without being a member tbh, that would solve one problem as they know too much about our strategies. Thank you for replying I appreciate it 🙏

The FDS sub was in principle a space where women can talk freely and without being tone-policed so I don't think the mods are purposefully silencing the conversation. There were a lot of complaints about the episode and Elle, and then some spoke up about other ways they were dissatisfied with the sub; I saw some comments about the quality of posts, mod response and general sub attitudes towards mental illness. The sub was basically self-destructing, and I'm pretty sure male lurkers were making it worse with downvoting and harassing dms. I just don't think they could respond to everyone fast enough.

It’s a strict place for sure. I am in fds for the knowledge bank and handbook , and to hear wisdom, not to argue and play politics. American politics doesn’t affect me and fds standards apply across the spectrum of identities, politics, and national borders. Not surprised things are getting deleted, but sad about the inconsistent standards of enforcement of rules for participation. I just want handbook.

For sure, I didn’t see any offensive slurs but I definitely understand wanting to shut it down - like the Reddit forum. From my understanding what was going down on the subreddit was very out of pocket.

Members are not allowed to attack each other and use offensive slurs - conversation and criticism is allowed as long as it’s civil. Please read and respect the forum rules or your account will be temp or permanently blocked.

I hope there’s one for everyone. I’d like to be in that chat. Not just people who pay, since everyones opinions/feedback matters.

I'm gonna go out on a limb & say the discord isn't going to be much different .. if someone feels up to creating an alt server or shit even a Telegram channel I'm all ears ...

Yep, just tried to re-read some comment I saw a couple of hours ago and now the entire thread is gone!! This isn’t Reddit, I thought FDS is a better place than that. Any suggestions for alternative anonymous apps for healthy and open discussions? Discord?

I'm someone who supports open conversations when situations go awry*. I hope FDS is open-minded enough to hear what the community has to say. It's making me second guess my Patreon status, since it's solely supporting the Pod.

Edit: Spelling.