Been scrolling through relationship subs and as usual, plenty of women asking how to "work" with their shitty partner and insisting that he is "great" apart from this "just one problem" that they are stressing about 24/7.
And surprisingly a lot of redditors (that I came across at least) just straight up tell them to leave. Just break up. Just get a divorce. Just run. Especially these 19-early 20 young women in first relationship. Majority of comments tell them to (rightfully) just end it because they are so young, so many years ahead of them - so much more fish in the sea. No reason to stick with these pathetic manbabies who can't even be bothered to hide their disdain towards the woman.
But as usual, the argument from the woman herself is "Oh he is amazing and loving and yadda yadda - I wanna work on this relationship!".
Sis you are 20 years old. WTF are you even working on - raising him to be your parasitic manchild?
I am soooo glad I found FDS in my middle 20s and going into my 30s now, realizing just how easy it is dating with FDS minded.
Growing up I was soo afraid of marriage because I feel like it is a death sentence to my personality. I will just end up being one of those forgotten "mother of so and so" and "wife of so and so" and that's all I will be remembered as upon my death.
The struggle, the work, the personality I worked so hard on allll will be forgotten and erased in favor of being a "good wife". That all my intelligence and achievements have to be suppressed and hidden because "your future man would not like that".
That all my hobbies, my skills, my talent should be forgotten because I need to learn how to do house chores, child rearing, cooking. I hate that stupid expectation and once upon a time, I even hate being born a woman.
But then FDS came in, cut straight through the bullshit and say "If he want to, he would". That I don't have to pay for dates and pay my "portion of the bills" - he can either pay all or I can just not give him my time.
That I have nothing to be afraid of even if literally zero man on earth can measure up to my standards - I can live my single life happily and build my own support system. I can just just not to get married if I don't want to.
That the "wall" is a lie and now I am past my "wall" age - yes, yes men still chase me. That I don't have to do chores and cook and all if I don't want to - he can either do it or I can just not give him my time.
FDS says "No, your standards aren't "too high". Your standards is completely yours and if the man can't be that and more - don't waste your time."
That being with a man is not why I am here, being born on this earth. That my life is mine alone, and the man can either being the cherry on top of my icing or I can be the whole-ass complete ice-cream by myself. That being born a woman is the greatest privilege I can get.
FDS makes me realize I don't have to suffer in a relationship - like sooo many women around me are experiencing. I don't have to stay with a shitty man, I don't have to settle with shitty man because "my time is running out", I don't have to stay with a man that makes me unhappy, stressed out, and uncomfortable.
A relationship should be EASY! I should be happy, content, safe, and taken care off - if at any point in time I cease to feel any of that - it is time to go. A relationship should be easy - none of this "working on it" BS. It makes sense to "work on" raising a child or climbing the career ladder - NOT maintaining a relationship with another adult. NOT "taking care" of an adult. NOT having to put so much effort in pleasing him and getting his attention so that his eyes won't stray. NONE of those gatekeeping BS.
My partner - who is a full-on mature adult just like myself - should be great from the get-go and we maintain the relationship like two very mature adults. And it will be easy and happy. Or I will walk away the second I feel even a hint of off-ness.
May y'all find your easy and happy relationship ladies, with or without a man. Stay safe.