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We Were Dragged by The Verge magazine. They missed the point.

Updated: Nov 22, 2022

I suspect we will have a lot of new readers soon, and let me first extend a friendly hello to all the Newbies!

I attempted to respond to each point that Erin made with links to our literature pointing out the flaws and contradictions in her assertions about FDS, but quite frankly, the article is all over the place, conflating so many different ideas and so poorly written that direct response would end up being extensive and similarly nonsensical.

Instead, I'd like to instead address the overall premise of the article that FDS is oppressive to women's autonomy and the flaws of "choice" feminism. I invite people to form their own assessments of the site based on our actual ideology, and not a poorly constructed surface level Liberal Feminist hack job of an article.

In particular, I will address this passage:

>The site also echoes a brand of anti-porn feminism that reaches back to the 1970s and 1980s’ Feminist Sex Wars. Sex-positive feminists argued for, as author Gayle Rubin put it, the “decriminalization of sexuality and for all consenting persons to do what they wished sexually.” Their opponents argued that porn, BDSM, and sex work were inherently oppressive and degrading to women. But by denying women autonomy over their bodies and sexual choices, they often ended up dehumanizing women who didn’t live up to their moral standards.

What Erin fails to understand is that the reason FDS has resonated with so many women is precisely because it is a sound rejection and response to "choice" feminism being heavily and uncritically promoted by mainstream media, much like Erin does in her article.

“Choice” feminism (i.e. Liberal Feminism) does women a disservice because it claims BDSM, Sex Work, and Porn as empowering and inherently feminist choices with almost absolutely no context. Under what circumstances is it empowering and feminist? To what extent are these things freely given and to what extent are they coerced by men influencing society (especially through porn) in ways so that women feel they have little choice to do it? Is it actually empowering for women to be reenacting their sexual trauma in front of the male gaze? There’s plenty of women who are using kink and sex work to self abuse and really need to go to a therapist instead of another BDSM party.

We are not taking away women's autonomy, as much as we are pointing out that your choices within a capitalist patriarchy are not truly autonomous, and that there are many economic, social, legal, political forces (primarily orchestrated by men) to coerce you into doing things against your benefit under the guise of feminism.

And what we're seeing in the real world, outside the bubble of liberal feminist ideology, is severe physical, emotional, and social consequences to engaging in this behavior, as well as raging pushback from men on our attempts to set boundaries.

The ENTIRE reason interest in FDS grew at an exponential rate is because men were outraged at our assertions that: 1) we deserve better treatment, 2) that we are entitled to take as much time as we want to assess them as sexual partners, 3) that we want to set boundaries on porn use, 4) that we are entitled to make value judgments on their sexual habits, and 5) They're not entitled to our endless understanding and emotional labor without tangible reciprocity, They were SO outraged, they rage posted our content all over the internet. FDS was primarily spread by men who were psychotically angry that women would dare set limits on their sexual access. Thanks, haters!

Calling us "socially conservative" is laughable, when at our very core we are challenging the status quo, which overwhelmingly benefits men at our expense. *This is why the scrotes are hopping mad about the existence of this site*, something Erin seems have wholly missed in her rush to label us as regressives.

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