I already told her that I wouldn’t feel comfortable with knowing that, even if he never did it again. She’s an ex sex worker and asked me if it was hypocritical to not date men who have bought sex before if she hopes men will date her despite having sold it in the past. I told her that there are men who would ruthlessly judge her due to the patriarchy and unashamedly cast her aside so there is nothing wrong with women being turned off by the very men who create the demand for the sex industry.
I also said I felt it was far different because she was the one being exploited, he was the one who bought a woman/rented her body to be exploited. Therefore I just think what he did in the past is much worse.
I know the guy too and he doesn’t seem like the kind of guy who would need to purchase sex. He said it was a few times when he was younger, in a different country playing pro basketball, and all his guy friends just wanted sex without the effort… also said he paid for a happy ending massage. He expressed remorse and guilt, said he learned about why it was wrong.
Even though he isn’t my man, it gives me the ick to hear about… maybe I just think my friend could do better and that men will always have some misogyny implanted if they bought sex before. I don’t know if I’m thinking too much.
edit; I never ever shame her and always reassure her not to look down on herself for being groomed into SW like so many women are subjected to.