How do you guys get men to invest?

it happens after you're gone. A man's love is useless.

Ive had men I've dumped then they realize they're in love with me, or they go through some ego-death in which I'm the one that got away this and that. Yet when we WERE together they act like shit heads and it's generally a waste of your time hanging out with them.

Soo yeah when dating a man they expect you to put up a clown circus to keep them entertained when you're together but when they fall in love and regret NOT INVESTING MORE IN YOU is when you're gone. The only women you see where the men is investing in her is AFTER she put up a clown show for him (The pickmes). And even when he invests in the woman- he hates spending a dime on her.

From my observation the women who get this treatment are extremely high maintenance and focus on themselves— and I don’t mean this in a bad way. It equates to putting yourself first and not allowing a man to drain your energy. By focuing on yourself, you set the precedent that you have boundaries and self respect. Men then understand that to enter your world it needs to be earned.

For me, it usually falls by the second or third date. That’s when they get too comfortable with me or try to test my boundaries. I drop them out of nowhere after that.

I talked to one of my girl friends who somehow scored a guy six years younger than her and made more money than her. She advocates on not initiating for anything EVER! Letting him offer to do all the work. Never suggest anything; you just want to sit back and see what he says.

If he offers something really bad, don’t accept. Be prepared to never talk to him ever again if nothing changes.

Talk is cheap, so of course we're all going to meet more guys who will swear up and down they want to be with us, than actual grown men who back it up with action.

When they do things like future-fake, they don't actually like us. They want to trick us into letting them use us. They think of us as vending machines - put certain things in, get certain goods and services.

What we learn here at FDS is not "how do we get these men to change". They are unlikely to change from someone who has the attitude that women are appliances that exist for them to use, to someone who can truly love and appreciate a woman.

Whether they change or not in the future is entirely up to them, it is not within our control. It's also not within our control whether we will meet a real one.

What we do control is whether we recognize the fakers, and whether we give those fakers continued access to us.

The more time we give the fakers, the less time we have to meet someone who is for real. So it is to our benefit to learn to suss out the fakers quickly and throw them out without hesitation. Don't hold on to a guy hoping you can get him to be something he is not.

I’m sorry sister but withholding sex is unfortunately the requirement. I know it’s fun, but it is truly detrimental. I say this from a lot of experience. The men who will be the most obsessed, giving, and in love will be the one you make wait and wait for sex with you. You can be intimate in a lot of other ways than letting him penetrate you. You can even just let him use his hands or a toy which can be a middle ground between withholding and getting pleasure for yourself. Men thrive off of fantasy. Once the fantasy is dead, their desire usually dies too. This is only untrue once they’re fully entangled with you through biological and sociological bonding (not through sex but through consistently making him spend money on you and do physical labor for you). This triggers a man’s mind to view you as someone he has to keep investing into because of the sunken cost fallacy. Once they’ve invested enough money, time, and physical resources, they feel pretty much ownership of you because that’s just how males minds work, but you can use this to gain. Be more selfish, and require more from them. Don’t settle for anything less than your ideal.