We were both really up front that male behavior bothers us, but she constantly has males around her, being loud, interrupting women, and just being too much.
She acts completely different around men, but I know she's going to play victim if i leave.
Is there a good way to handle this, without seeming like the jerk?
I can't tell her to cut off male friends, but escaping male psychological warfare is why I wanted to date a woman.
They aren't even nice to her.
I'd be careful dating women and thinking they can't be patriarchal, if anyone on here is curious.
Dating her has put me around MORE of them, because they're always sniffing around her, and IM the femme between us two...
It sounds like the two of you aren't a match. There's really no way you can dump her without her feeling some type of way about it.
But is this the life you want forever? If this relationship continued on for five more years exactly this same way, would you be happy? If you're not happy, end it. Let her find someone who fits with what she wants. And allow yourself to do the same.
And for Pete's sake, get some therapy; this post and the other one indicate a lot of people-pleasing traits. People-pleasing is not healthy. It will just screw you over in the long run. I say this out of love - have more consideration for yourself.