I'm a part time contractor looking for full time in my field.
For this past year, I've been working with this woman that's giving me trouble. She thinks I'm going to steal her work boyfriend who's in his 50's. She's in her early 40's and divorced. Holyshit, I know we don't owe eachother anything, but the things that come out of her mouth when she talks to me...I have been nothing but nice to her; given her space when she's with her bf, and stayed out of her way. Her comments towards me are so backhanded and she ignores me. I've tried to befriend her but she shuts down the conversation with me and ignores me.
Anyways, full time contracts are out, and there's another contractor that she wants to get the job because that girl is less threatening. She's been going out of her way to make me feel like shit and to bully me into giving up ever applying to the position. She keeps saying that there's no use in applying because the positions and schedule is already made with the other person in mind.
I went to my employer, they said that nothing has been made yet and encouraged me to apply.
My coworkers told me that she's like that to everyone, and that she doesn't really know me which is why she's doing that. And that they've been treated like that as well. Some have also told me that she has high seniority, which is why she has attitude. In addition, that she's close to retirement, so she can afford to not care to be friendly.
Moving forward, I think it's safe to say that I won't be having lunch near her and will likely be with people who make me feel good about myself.
I'm in my second year of work at this place and it's like my first time working in a serious setting. I try my best to treat people with kindness, but she's wearing me down.
Unfortunately this is one the ways pickmes act when they have low self esteem coupled with knowing their man is a cheating horn dog. She is taking out her insecurities out on you. No it's not fair. But don't let this person stop you from applying for your contract.
Oh I've totally been there, bitter tenured folks are the worst.
Sometimes for these pick-mes it's better to not be too attractive around her because it'll make her deeply insecure, consider being less feminine I guess? These people are annoying and it's hard to tell what to do because these people mostly just need therapy and political awareness.
I'd just keep doing your best and sticking to the point. Stay as objective as possible so that if she has a future tantrum she won't have dirt on you, you could even start recording interactions in case she tries spreading rumors or bringing fake problems to management.
It's all about feeling threatened in some way, I don't know her personally but maybe you could analyze your past interactions and break them down to deduce a better understanding of it. Alternatively that would drive you insane because it kinda doesn't matter.
Ultimately just keep doing your best, these types of people exist everywhere I promise, it's like handling an old grumpy cat.