viral post on tumblr making it’s rounds again. I was groomed into bdsm and I find this misleading.

Exactly! We’re not making infographics how aspects of our lives aren’t abuse.

This is such an important point! There's no need for articles about "Grocery Shopping vs. Abuse" or "The Difference Between Making Your Morning Coffee and Abuse". It's just further proof that men use this kink as an excuse to abuse women all the time.

This is just like when people in MLMs try say "it's not a pyramid scheme!" If it's really not, people wouldn't need to be told so.

It reminds me of trauma bonding

It is trauma bonding.

I hope you are joking 🤢🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮

I speak from experience.

I've heard of sub drop. Although I'm not sure what it looks like- the name in of itself solidified how toxic and abusive bdsm is. Strange how vanilla sex doesn't have these issues. There is no victim who needs aftercare and a simple no/stop is sufficient, we don't need safe words.

People with knowledge of trauma psychology, repetition compulsion, domestic abuse and self harm knows the truth about this. Sadly few people know enough about this to wake up from the societal brainwashing. Most victims of DV act extactly like "subs" until they get out or get killed. You should leave reddit. It's psychological self harm. You can not save these people.

I feel so bad, I was cackling the whole time I read this, like, hmmm maybe being attracted to abuse b4 getting into an abusive relationship......made you more susceptible to falling into an abusive relationship? I die I die 🤣 💀 "I give up control temporarily to feel safe" my innocent mind would imagine this statement differently then she does. Like, to fall into a puddle of emotional security, I would only temporarily give control to a man who treats me very tenderly, attentively, focused on my needs and pleasure, more protection and sensitive towards me then I am toward myself. Not some dumb fuck who takes gratification in hitting me until I cry. My brain wouldn't be broken enough to find safety in that. Like how can you have a healthy emotional state as a woman and need to be told you are worthless to be turned on and only feel "trust" and "safety" with men that want to leave bruises on someone weaker and smaller than them. Why give up control in exchange for that treatment to feel safe and okay. In moments like this, imagine how you would want to see yourself treated if you were looking at your own daughter who's a carbon copy of you. Does it make you happy that she needs her partner to hit her and he only speaks to her with degrading language? Often, this little exercise is easier than loving ourselves.

It's not funny. Women get killed by men like this all the time. They are coping in the only way they can. Society makes women hate themselves. Even makes them imagen they love to hate themselves. It's utterly sad. https://wecantconsenttothis.uk/