I know this is not a post about dating strategy per se, but in many ways those of us who suffer from severe premenstrual symptoms every/majority of cycles will attest to the fact that it does make dating very hard for a number of reasons. Low self-esteem either as a cause of - as well as - cruelly exacerbated by the condition, intrusive thoughts and overwhelming negative feelings that make it very hard to think clearly and rationally about anything, depressive spells that make it hard to even face the day. Yes, all those and the other horrific symptoms that magically disappear with the onset of bleeding can really spell disaster for one's dating/love life.
If I could sum it up I would say that it's consistency that is the issue. It's hard to stay consistent when you have a mental health problem like this. And I mean consistency towards yourself and keeping a good lifestyle (healthy eating, sleeping, working out, keeping stress in check), and also towards others - your work, your friends and loved ones, and your partner if you have one. It's a chaotic nightmare when the episodes hit. Getting yourself to perform in daily life and be the best version of yourself - or even half of who you normally are - feels like trying to run through mud and you're exhausted and feel like a failure.
I would be keen to discuss the obstacles PMDD presents in levelling up in general, something I'm really struggling with especially now as I'm going through a really tough phase of life. What I find as well is that when tough times come along, of course this exacerbates the PMDD, and more tough times can result because of it due to the decisions you make when you're in that much pain. It's such a vicious cycle.
I've had PMDD episodes since my early twenties and I'm now in my mid-twenties. My better self is ambitious, I have goals for myself, I'd say I am academically pretty bright, and have achieved some things with my life (moving abroad, doing my degree in a foreign country in a foreign language, working in a good company and having an interesting job role). I've had many ups and downs though. I've had to take time off work for PMDD. I've never managed to hold down relationships (tbf I chose LVM, I didn't think I deserved better, and inevitably they all ended... i do have to say thanks to the PMDD which makes my tolerance levels for LVM behaviour minus 100). My longest relationship lasted 8 months. I feel that I regularly self sabotage, nearly quitting things (jobs, hobbies) all the time, feeling like I can't cope, hanging on by a thread and in my good times trying to overcompensate.
Has anyone found peace with the condition? Are there any ladies who can recommend some methods of treatment that worked for them (that preferably don't include SSRIs)? How do you stop the self sabotage and stay consistent, stay on track, and ultimately become successful?