Hi sisters,
So I recently logged into Instagram for the first time in ages. I spiralled a bit and ending up looking at pages of instagram models. It was the the more local ones to me, who have followers in the thousands (not millions).
I felt terribly inferior. Their lifestyles appear so lavish: always at hotels, bars etc. and they look so physically 'perfect' in a way I never will because I haven't had surgery.
I'm in the writing up stage of my phd- I'm so tired and stressed trying to reach my goal. I am passionate about research but i envy these girls, for their lifestyles, beauty and the attention they get. I feel worthless and I like I made the wrong choice pursuing intellectual achievements.
I feel absolutely guilty and terrible about feeling this way. I want to snap out of it but finding it hard. Any advice? For one, i have deleted instagram.
When I was writing my dissertation, my entire world molded into one big giant blob that revolved around my PhD thesis. This isn’t healthy, but it was all I thought about. And my mind was pretty fuzzy, I wasn’t thinking clearly, etc. I used to daydream about going on adventurous hiking trips in the mountains.
As soon as I graduated, I did just that! I definitely felt like the world was passing me by, but at the end of the day, I ended up with a degree that opened a lot of doors for me. You’re doing this for your future. Hang in there ! And think about some fun hobby or trip you want to do after you submit and want to blow off steam.
Social media is always tempting. Some people decide to pursue careers in modeling or influencing. You chose an academic route - presumably because you enjoy research. I accepted other women are hotter than me and put more effort into it. What can I do? I just don’t have the energy to spend hours doing my hair everyday 🤷🏼♀️