Before I get crucified—I am not advocating women become sex workers. A woman has nothing to gain, in the long run, from marketing herself as a sex worker and selling her body online or on the streets for cash.
But.
We can all agree sex with women should not be free for men. In order to prove they are good providers, men should invest in women before, during, and after sex. This is non-negotiable.
(Edit: By "sex", I don't mean just physical sex. I mean sexual/romantic attention in addition to physical sex. You know, the kind of attention women give to men they're dating.)
My main question: should we expect (or at least not be insulted by) monetary investment from men who want to date us? By "monetary investment", I mean cash and stocks*.
My personal opinion is that women in the West do not accept ENOUGH money from men who want our time, effort, and bodies. Would we all benefit if we asked for money from men who wanted to date us?
And how upfront should we be about it?
*I really do mean cash and stocks. Not a dinner/show/lingerie/manicure he pays for but also gets to enjoy. Not a designer bag he may have dug out from his sister's closet. Not jewelry he may have purchased at a discount from a friend. Not a car that's under his name. Not an apartment that's under his name. Not even an apartment that's under your name, because when he visits, he is enjoying the apartment as well. I mean cold, hard cash that is completely yours and that he cannot access once he gives it to you.
My background:
I live in the U.S. and work in a highly-skilled profession that currently pays $70/hour. When I work, I give my clients 100% of my attention/effort for the amount of time we agree on. I never half-ass my job, and I never negotiate my rate.
In the West, women give this sort of time and energy to the men they date, and the expectation is that they should do it for free. Dates cost women time and money, even if men pay for dinners and transportation, so if a man doesn't pay a woman cash ON TOP OF paying for the activities they do together, then the woman is losing money and literally paying for the pleasure of the man's company. It's just not right.
>Would we all benefit if we asked for money from men who wanted to date us?
that's called prostitution. they would treat us even worse because they'd be literally paying to have access to us. no, they would not treat us like they treat their car. they already treat us badly outside prostitution.
if you want all women to benefit from men, you (all of us) need to DENY access to our bodies and company and everything we have to offer until men as a class improve.
being paid to be with a man does not make our situation better. my dignity is priceless.
It's prostitutes and prostitution. Not sex workers. Paid rape ain't sex.
Um. I’m not gonna lie, I’m used to getting a credit card from my boyfriend for whatever I want whether it’s to pay my bills, go out, travel, etc. It’s very normal for men in relationships to give women their credit card to use as they wish. It’s a staple of generosity so it’s definitely not insulting for a man to spend lavishly on his gf/wife. If you want to get stocks I’d say just use his card to buy stocks lol. He won’t care, the money is for your pleasure and to be spent at your whim.
BUT to have the card of a man I’m only dating? Ehhh. 🤔 I mean, it’s already pretty standard that he’s paying for transport (if downtown), the dates, and gifts (flowers, candy, chocolates, etc) as the intital investment and then his bills get higher to more he levels up the relationship. Getting cash from some random dude tho…? I’d be worried he’d give you fake cash and get you arrested. I wouldn’t accept money or stocks from men you haven’t fully vetted and have proven in time they’re actually generous. A boyfriend giving you his credit card is normal, but a man who’s not proven himself is very sketchy to me. Some things are better done once relationships have been fully established.
I do sometimes.
That, or jewelry.
It's not for sex. It's for my company, which they don't deserve naturally.
Yes, and you should ask for anything you want because it’s your world. Erase any ideas about “entitlement” because you ARE entitled. Your feminine energy is literally priceless.