Do you think they're a good or bad distraction? I mean for example women who idealize k-pop singers, or actors, or book characters, or Instagram personalities... Someone who you'll never meet or maybe doesn't even exist. I think it's healthier than joining the apps, or idealizing a real existing man. As long as you don't really end up stalking them, wanting to be their gf... Just allowing the lovey dovey feelings in a safe environment , a man who won't hurt you (you don't even know him lol). Do you find the benefits too or it's better to avoid this, and if yes why? Thank you
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I honestly used to believe it was harmless, but similar to the other commenter, if it's used as a bad coping mechanism for your self esteem, maladaptive daydreaming/fantasizing/limerence, or in any other sense a distraction from working on yourself and leveling up it's a waste of time. Been down the "wholesome celebrity man turns out to be huge prick or literal felon/rapist" road too many times (male and female tbh) so I don't idolize any public figures anymore. I realized it basically directly conflicts with my values because I wouldn't like the amount of self interest and obsession it takes to reach the rich and famous level, not to mention it's almost always pursued to compensate for some vendetta, trauma, or emotional inadequacy I'm not interested in solving.
That being said, I do imagine types of men I'd like to be with so I'd know an example of someone who met my standards if I saw them. I imagine the types of love I would want out of a relationship and how I'd like to receive and return that love so that I keep my eyes open and notice someone who really cares. It's kind of my antidote to ensure I don't end up thinking too negatively/cynically and helps me somewhat believe "not all men" so I can maintain openness to a future connection but not project the fantasy of a celebrity crush onto them.