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Hello !
I already made several post here.
I have a little issue. The bar is in HELL
I'll do a recap of my love Life : my 1st ex was really shitty. REALLY. Super lazy. Wouldn't do anything for me. I was his nurse. My second was great (or at least, normal). I made him happy and he made me happy. Unfortunately due to personal circunstances it came to an end.
After that, my date were CRAP. My last date (1 months ago) put me in a very bad mood. He didnt paid our 3rd date (it was 2€70 like 3 dollar) whereas he was almost wanting to marry me without even knowing me or asking relevant question about myself. Honestly it made me miss my second ex and I was sad for a bit, but it's my fault. I should have had stopped everything on 1st date. This guy wasn't interested in my personality. For example when I showed him how much I loved animals showing mines he didnt said anything. He asked me to show picture of me instead. It was always like this. Never took interest in who I was or what I liked.
I started talking to someone I haven't met yet (I am not excited I dont wanna be disappointed, it's not online dating it's smth else). I gave to him my name and he ..knew the origin of my name. Either he knew it or he looked for it. I was... very happily surprised of that little attention. HOWEVER, it's not smtg big. It doesn't mean anything. It's bare minimum : taking interest in thé person yoûre talking to ! Even in friendship this is basic décency. I started get excited. But I should not. It's just that my bar is very low. I am happy that someone googled my name. That's ridiculous !!! I have a huge scarcity mindset due to last experiences !!
Also, I think it's self sabotaging but when someone do little stuff like this I may think "it's à player" "it's not serious !". It can be, but it does not mean it's true !!!! I have this mindset ! I thought that m'y boring date was à Nice Guy bc he was shy or whatever excuse I may have found him but he was not even one !! (Didnt paid, asking for picture)
What can I do please ?
Thanks !!!
Did you read the handbook at all??? Stop dating and get some therapy or heal yourself. If you love yourself enough, you will be able to vet properly. Sometimes we have to go through these experiences to learn but you still need to be careful and don’t ever send pictures of yourself to anyone you are not in a committed relationship with.
Once you work on yourself and heal, you'll naturally vet these guys further upstream so you don't waste your time