I have changed my number about 3 times within last 14 years.
Because of men.
One was a stalker who found my family records and everything even after I blockt, the next was an Abuser who made numerous fake numbers to contact me after I moved on, and now the third man is.... something I need to move on from.
This third man was a man I've known for over 10 years and it was very much a LDR that ebs and flows. we had a rocky two year relationship and we just kept in contact. I really don't want to get into the details but I KNOW this will get me to stop talking to him cause in no effing way am I giving a man this new number.
I'm dramatic. I want a clear slate. I may not have self control but I know that when I do have a clear "marker" of a new start, I know how to control myself. This may be a weird trait to some, maybe lol.
It's so much damn work to change my number and in no way am I going to text any man from my past again.
I have learned from FDS to use Google voice numbers when dating. That is my new plan.
I think I'll only give him my real number if we are at the stage of joining each others family vacations which in that case, there would already be talk of engagement or marriage.
The more I read FDS and study other FDS teachers on other platforms, then I'll graduate out of the PickMe mindset... and won't have the urge to get all crazy and hurt..(By the way- my friend said I may have BPD. Idk. Maybe? That's why I get crazy? I have severe C-PTSD and codependency.)
Either way, even if I get crazy with man in future, he will have my google number. I tend to forget to check my messaging apps for months. So that's Good. Men aren't important me anymore.
My new number is not for random men. Not anymore. theres important men in my life that may include family members, work related males, a tax person, a doctor, you know stuff like that... If you're not that, you're just a random man from the street.
any thoughts or opinions? Bad idea? Good idea? Dumb idea? any similar stories? Warnings?
I am already preparing everything and it won't be tonight that I'm changing it... but soon.
I just want to be free from my past.
Google voice numbers are the way to go! I use two of them in addition to my primary number. The primary only goes to people I know very well or women and even it has no reference on the account to my legal name.
I've had many stalkers too. Some continue from my teenage years to this day (I am in my thirties!). Zero tolerance with men is the only way. Trusting men is so foolish and yet we as women are never truly warned about this. Even male 'friends' have turned on me in an instant. From violent to life and reputation ruining to vindictive or just inexplicable ghosting. A clean slate comes with time and ruthless boundaries with men.
Changing your number is going to be a lot, but it’s SO worth it. I changed mine two years ago due to an ex sending me threats. I also had to move to a new city and quit my job to get away from him. A clean slate is always good, but change your number THEN use a google number and don’t give out your real number to anyone.
Often times what people think as BPD is actually a symptom of trauma, not actually a disorder in and of itself. For example, a survivor of abuse becomes distrustful of others is a trauma response, not because of social anxiety disorder. When one is healed from trauma, the "disorder" also goes away.
You're not being dramatic. I changed my number once as a rite of passage and declutter my contacts so that I have no way to be in contact with people that aren't good for me.
Don't over think it. If blocking his number is not enough, change your number. BUT DO think carefully about who you share your number with moving forward.
You're protecting your peace, what's so dumb about that?
I'm struggling with something. Men these days might catch onto the fact that your number is a Google one. What are we supposed to tell them if they accuse us of using a Google number? My Google number (although I have never used it yet) is a different area code than either my or my dad's real number.
if anything i would say stand your ground buuut i have been on the receiving end of men abusing the use of having my phone number. find out information about THEM where do they work. Who do they speak to on a regular basis. Where do THEY live?