This isn't me defending Indian scrotes or trying to paint India as some kind of feminist paradise btw. I'm well aware that my family is from one of the more liberalized parts of India which values women. And I love visiting my family, but I will never agree to stay there and have an arranged marriage like I know they want me to. My experience is vastly different from the women and girls who actually have to live in the more underdeveloped parts of the country full time
But at the same time, it's kinda wierd because I've grown up hearing about all kinds of atrocities against women like what happened in this article, sex selective abortion, packs of men teaming up to break into houses in order to gang rape 7 year olds, and videos of travel vloggers getting sexually assaulted in broad daylight....
but whenever I try to bring this up to my mom she gets really angry and is all like "how dare you talk about Indian men this way. You do realize that includes your uncles and male cousins right?"
And the thing is... she's right. My uncles have never done anything but dote on me and spoil me rotten whenever I visit. And my male cousins are amazing fellows who I love so much. If there was ever such a thing as a male feminist, they would be the closest thing this world has to one.
And honestly, in India, my experience as a woman hasn't been so bad either (I don't want to live there because I don't like Indian food and I have a phobia of of lizards, which keep showing up in the houses). The worst thing that's ever happened to me was when I got groped in a mall and even then, it wasn't even that bad in hindsight.
Anyways, it's just really wierd hearing/learning about how the place you grew up and spent every summer as a child is actually hell on earth for women, and that the men you love are simply outliers for one of the most viciously misogynistic cohort of scrotes to ever exist. That's basically the point of this post. Rambling over
I get the feeling that the kind of violence perpetrated on women (actually, also often on men) that we hear coming out of India seems to be a particularly depraved kind. Like, it's weirdly barbaric. I think the raping murder of that poor woman Jyoti in New Delhi in 2012 really shocked people because of the crueltly that the men inflicted on her - when the details emerged of what they did to her it really was hard to believe. And these sorts of stories, also like the one you've shared here of beheading and just really depraved stuff, seem to be failry common. In short, I think it's not just the frequency of incidents of male violence against women that makes India especially misogynist compared to other countries, it's the depravity and cruelty of the violence (that we often hear about) that stands out.
Lastly, I'm really glad you have excellent male relatives - that's great for you, and pretty unusual anywhere in the world!
Ah the classic, when you talk about bad men they say you would also be hurting the “good” men. Just another way to shut women up about male violence.
You seem very young. I don't think your mom know EVERYTHING about male psychology, you have every right to point out what's not right in your opinion. "Not all men" is such an eye roll thing to say. Maybe not all men hurt women. But all men hate when you point out what makes you uncomfortable about them, instead of reassuring you.
A lot of Westerners don't realize just how many people India has.
There was that gangrape that killed that desi girl about a decade ago, and we read about that without taking into account how Indias female prime minister expressed sympathy and the nation recoiled in horror.
You guys also had a LOT of goddess worship and historic periods of female freedom that would make the modern western woman cry tears of joy.
Even Western countries used to kill baby girls by putting us in pots and letting us freeze a few hundred years ago.
All men from all nations antagonize us. Your men aren't worse than mine in the grand scheme of things, I promise.
https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nation/2013/05/01/ohio-rape-baby/2126323/.
If it's not female, it's not safe, and I have more in common with YOU as a White woman than I do with this guy. ^
I sometimes wonder if you're one of the luckier ones though.