I'm at that age, I guess, mid-thirties, where my coupled friends are very, very eager to see me coupled up. Far more so than I am.
So they keep asking me what I'm looking for in a man, and I give them a list of about ten items of things that I am looking for in a partner. (Because I've been in relationships, and dated, and reflected, and now very clearly understand what will work best for me in a long-term partnership.)
Of course, these friends act like I am UNBELIEVABLY unrealistic, and that if I really, really want a man (which...I don't?), I have to SERIOUSLY reconsider my list, and pick maybe ONE or TWO things that I REALLY want in a man.
And so, I found, I can honestly summarize my ten checklist-items down into two. I am really looking for a man who:
1) I am physically attracted to, and
2) shares my values
I went out with a guy recently who I really liked but during the date revealed a total deal-breaker red-flag and so I won't be seeing him again. My one friend railed on me about how he just needs help/building/etc. (he's 40?), and her husband chimed in too, and I'm sitting there thinking "If I were to follow your advice I would get my ass beat and possibly shot." They don't even know the guy--why are people SO QUICK to defend a man's worst admissions? Like I'm the one who is your friend--shouldn't you have my back?
Anyway, just a small rant to those who can relate. Misery loves company, as they say, and perhaps my unhappily-coupled friends need to justify their situations by imparting their "advice" to me.
I love my life, ladies. I honestly love my life. I'm travelling and working and I have my dogs, my reading, my movies, my adventures. I don't have to ask permission to anyone for anything for any reason. I can spend my money exactly as I like.
And when I do date, it's fun! As it should be!
I have no complaints, and I don't need unhappy people trying to couple me up with some totally unsuitable person.
Stay sane out there ladies! ✌️
I'm mid thirties and married and I have friends I of course would like to see coupled up in a healthy relationship. But I also have friends that are married that I would LOVE to see divorce their awful husbands lol. Friends that want to see you lower your standards and settle is a more misery loves company situation than wanting to see you happy.