A few months ago I went on a few dates with this guy. He planned and paid for all the dates. Communication was great and he was very respectful. He had a ton of HV traits. Great family and great friends, and he was very reliable and dependable. Of course I dug through who he follows on instagram and did find a few models🚩 Other than that nothing alarming. But the models were more than enough of a reason for me to exclude him as a suitor. I liked him a lot as a person so when I told him I didn’t want to see him again I said I would like to keep him in my life as a friend. He was really bummed and said he liked me a lot and wanted to be friends as well but needed to wait a while to reach out again just to make sure he was able to hangout with me platonically in the future. I thought okay cool that seems like a nice and mature way to handle the situation.
So fast forward about 6 weeks. He texted for the first time after we ended things and asked if I wanted to see my favorite comedian he was going to be in town. I thought ok that was a pretty respectful amount of time to wait. So we hung out a couple times since then. We became fast friends and really enjoyed each other’s company. I was starting to feel safe around him and open up to him. I definitely had noticed a few times he was staring deeply at me when we were together. I know he still has feelings for me. I did have an ulterior motive - I have just started a business in a sector that his family has a lot of connections in. So I really didn’t mind it and I know he wasn’t going to fuck all this up by telling me he still has feelings for me. Now here’s an important piece of information. I’m Asian and he’s white. Anyway so today for some reason I decided to look at his instagram following again. As soon as we started hanging out as friends again he had started following a bunch of very explicit models on instagram. AND THEY ARE ALL ASIAN. Wtf. BARF. I had thought hey he was actually one of the few guys I know that I even semi respected🤡. Now thinking about all those times we hung out as friends he was probably just Undressing me in his head the whole time. I’m really grossed out and regret telling him vulnerable things about myself, as friends! I will never believe that people who’ve gone on dates with can be platonic friends anymore. Ugh. So grossed out. Thought I had a good friend🤮