I would like y'all's advice on how to deal with grief in a healthy, HV way. In particular, how to deal and manage the grief of losing a father who was a HVM.
Yesterday morning, my father passed away after a long battle with cancer. While we all knew it was coming at some point, we weren't expecting it especially since he had been in such high spirits the day before. We were a very close knit family since I'm an only child and my parents are wonderful people who truly loved and cared about me. In the past 24 hours, I have been taking care of the logistics and trying to comfort my mother and I feel like I haven't really thought so much about my own grief. I plan to seek counseling/therapy and I plan on writing all the good memories I have with him in a journal but I'm not sure what else to do. If I'm being honest, I'm lost, especially since something this big is something I would've wanted advice from him about. I'm in medical school so I still have to finish out my year which is what he would have wanted.
At this point, my dad's family is coming out of the woodwork and for the most part, they are LV which is why my dad cut them off before I was even born. I'm doing my best to handle them for my mom because they're causing her more stress and grief by hovering and blaming her for my father's death.
I guess what I'm looking for is advice on what to do (logistically and emotionally) since my primary goals are to honor my father's wishes, take care of and protect my mother, and take care of myself and manage my grief. I just feel lost and overwhelmed and I'm not sure what to do and where to start. Thank you ladies so much ❤️
P.S. The funeral home is asking for his favorite songs and some of his favorite songs are a bit sad or slightly morbid (think Old Turkey Buzzard from Mackenna's Gold) so I wasn't sure if I should still pick them since they were his favorites or find something else? I asked my mom what she thought but she's understandably overwhelmed (especially because she was the one that found him and called 911) and doesn't have any input right now. Thank you again!