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WARNING: These are HANDBOOK POSTS -- WRITTEN A LONG TIME AGO by some great women with great thoughts and deemed as handbook worthy by FDS mods for a reason. If you feel triggered or disagree with something -- THE SMART THING TO DO IS TO MOVE ON. Agree to disagree and go on your merry way. Stop trying to start bullsh*t in the comment section because I have no patience to deal with you.
Originally posted in FDS subreddit. All rights reserved to the original writer.
LVs will fake support you and when you start succeeding they will try lowering you down. Drop the deadweight.
From experience heres what I noticed about some guys that initially seemed nice and supportive. This was in my pickme days.
He will say "you got this" and act like he will cheer you. I was in school. He said we could study for tests together and help each other review.
At first it'll seem sweet and encouraging, and go well. Next time, he will start to get lazy and before you know it he's goofing off on his phone as you're trying to work.
Next thing is that he will start pestering you, over silly stuff, despite knowing you're working. Whether it's calls at work, pestering you when he knows you're in a Zoom meeting, trying to study, etc.
I also made the mistake of telling my dates my ambitions for the future.
I was going to outshine them, when many were lost and didn't know what they wanted to do or just lacked the ambition.
I applied for internships in undergrad but these guys would say things like "well don't worry about it, don't bother calling them, you don't even need it just work for your family".
I initially believed them. I ended up starting my own business and finishing some classes to actually finish my degree.
In the meantime I had taken some time off to figure myself out and because I needed the money. My lv ex would always tell me "yes get your degree finish school! Its worth it you got it".
I didn't have the money. So I took time to make the money then I heard criticism saying that the other jobs out there don't pay enough just build your small biz instead.
I heard "well you need that degree that's why no decent paying job wants you". So I got the degree finished, finally.
Then I heard negging "well you always say I'm not advancing but you're the loser that's been in school for way too many years!"
Then others I tried talking to would say well an undergrad isn't enough you NEED a masters! I had too much debt.
Some of these guys even told me to apply at fast food or Amazon warehouse instead of even trying to get hired in my field.
The thing was they all had loser jobs and no education and wanted to keep me held down rather than grow.
I had access to a ready hire job in my field that paid decent and whenever I'd talk about applying there they'd all tell me "oh you'll hate it. Just stay self employed".
When I talked about doing part time AmeriCorps which pays a little just for the experience they all said "that's a waste of time".
No matter what I did to better myself they just shut me down and brainwashed me that I was too good for it, or it wasn't worth it, or it wouldn't matter.
Nothing ever pleased them. They were low value and tried to drag me down to low value too. Plus none of these guys ever tried bettering themselves.
LVs are dangerous. They not only want a bangmaid, can spread disease, but they can also neg you and try every trick to hold you back. These men don't want to see you succeed. They are jealous and want a bangmaid they can be better than. These men are deadweight.
When dating, don't tell men what your plans or ambitions are. Don't tell them if you're in the application process to schools or jobs. You don't need the discouragement and you don't need to give them ammo. If you're vetting ask them the questions and be general about what you do.
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